GENTLEMEN, DON'T "B.S." YOURSELF ON YOUR FITNESS AND DIET NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION

                I thought I would share a little wisdom with all you older guys like me, who might be having visions of running up and down the beach like Apollo Creed and Rocky Balboa did in 1982'a ROCKY III,  with a brand new diet and exercise program for your New Year's Resolution: Especially if you are in your 40's or 50's.
              I seem to BS myself every year with the delusion that I will somehow miraculously recapture the physique I had in 1988. It is almost the end of the year, and yet again, I hardly have the UFC cage fighter physique I envisioned, as I STILL have those same hate handles and C-Cup man boobs I had way back on January 1st of this year. But I didn't realize how fat I was until I had to squeeze into a suit this past week for a Christmas Party. The "Ultimate Truth Teller" for me is ALWAYS when I try to wear a suit I hadn't worn in a year or so. My suit was a absolute pain in the ass and putting the damn thing on was a workout in and of itself. At the end of my dressing myself, I had fat-man beads of sweat on my forehead, sweat in my hot wet arm pits and also sweat in the crack of my ass from putting the damn thing on and it was absolute torture to wear from head to toe.  

               It started off bad from the very beginning:  My T-shirt was snug at the belly, not my pecs and shoulders, my tie felt like a hot scratchy hemp-noose, fully-tight and extended at the gallows around my fat neck and hefty chin: My torso in my dress shirt felt like a giant butterball turkey that was crammed and stuffed into a Ziplock sandwich bag: My belt felt like some sort of S & M device: My pants were so tight, I literally had to button them with the same force of doing crossover-cables at the gym until I could get my belly fat to ooze and settle over my belt, and then hurry and button them: My pant legs felt like I was wearing tourniquets around my thighs.  It is not a good sign of progress of fitness over the past year of if the only article of clothing when wearing a suit that is comfortable is your coat pocket handkerchief. Even my shoes felt like they were made out of wood and had lead plates in them. Hell, even my socks hurt and squeezed my fat toes, feet and ankles.  I couldn't wait to get home to burst out of that damn suit to get in my sweats and double XXL T-shirt to feel fit and slender again. Oh yeah, and all my selfies have to be taken from the neck up with my looking upwards, craning my neck to hide my triple chin and hide the Buddha physique.

              I don't know about you guys,  but what terrifies me most is thinking that I might need to use a dental mirror at age 60 to actually find my penis if my belly gets any bigger. 
        So once again, I am going to try to be like Rocky Balboa and am going to go balls out with diet and exercise until the Fourth of July, where I will look like Mark Wahlberg's stunt double with my shirt off!!!  I should realistically shoot for being brassiere free by the end of the year as opposed to looking like I did in 1988 with fantasies of chicks going gah-gah over me shirtless on Venice Beach. Right now, I look like Jabba The Hut, and that rhymes with GUT. So if you are like me, TIME TO GET IN SHAPE GENTLEMEN!!!!!

                   I have attached two pictures of me in 1988 and in 2015. I have also attached below, my diet for the last 4 months I have stuck diligently to and can't figure out why I haven't lost any  damn weight.  Any help would be greatly appreciated.

BREAKFAST : 1 cup of egg whites, one piece dry Ezekial Toast, 1 cup of black coffee

LUNCH: 1 cup of Kale, one chicken breast, one cup unsweetened iced tea

SNACK: 10 raw almonds

DINNER: One piece of steak, lean and grilled, 4 ounces with 8 boiled asparagus spears.

SNACK: Rest of the 12 ounce bag of almonds, one giant glass of chocolate whole milk. One Pizza from any pizza delivery chain, extra cheese and meats. One 12 pack of Guinness or some kind of microbrew oatmeal stout.

SNACK: One pint of Ben and Jerry's Cookie Dough Ice Cream

SNACK: One plate of nachos with guacamole and a bag of melted Kraft shredded sharp cheddar cheese, and one Diet coke. (Don't leave the 350 degree oven on before you pass out.)